Ok so I have my surgery scheduled. It will be on Feb 5th. I don't know what time because that part gets scheduled with the surgery center based on availability of operating rooms and stuff so that part comes a little closer to the day. But in the meanwhile I have been making a lot of appointments for things that I have kinda been procrastinating on. That and for a few things that I need to do but won't be able to after the fact.(or not for a little while at least depending on recovery and such) So this is what my schedule looks like until than:
Thu 22nd: 8:30pm Teaching with the elders
Fri 23rd: 9:30 am pre-op appt for my surgery
4-10pm EMT refresher course UCLA(so I keep my certification current)
Sat 24th: 8am-6pm EMT refresher course UCLA
Sun 25th: 8am-6pm EMT refresher course UCLA
Mon 26th: Weight watchers meeting at 12:15
4-10pm EMT refresher @ UCLA
Tues 27th: Disneyland with a friend
Weds 28th:
Thurs 29th: 8:30am dentist appt.
1:30 pm taking elders to lunch
This is also my brother in law's bday... don't know if doing a dinner or anything
Fri 30th: 7pm?? Wii activity at church
Sat 31st: 4pm Julie Beck fireside in Camarillo but going early for meeting
Sun 1st: Fast Sunday at church
Mon 2nd: 1pm lunch with a friend
Tues 3rd: 10:40am eye doctor appt
Weds 4th:
Thu 5th: SURGERY DAY
So as you can see there are only 2 openings left and that doesn't mean stuff won't come along and fill those days up too before than! Boy am I glad I bought and carry a small calander with me now so I can make sure I don't double book myself! I am that popular you know!
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Booked tight
Friday, January 16, 2009
Mom
I just wanted to say that my mom is the greatest ever!!! So the other night I posted about not having any luck finding a chaise..... the very next day I was telling my mom that I had seen a jogging stroller at one of the Simi Thrift stores and so we went back so she could check it out. When we pulled up in front there was a chaise!!!! It was so weird! ANyway we asked the guy if it was for sale and he said yes for $100. Everything in the store is on sale though for 15% off making it $85 plus tax. I sat on it and so did mom and we were thinking about purchasing it as it was fairly comfy. So then we walked in the store a little more and noticed a 2 piece couch unit that goes into a corner and makes an L shape when both pieces are together. Well the one piece of the L basically was a chaise as well. The couch unit was also $100. My mom told the guy that since this was 2 pieces and the one out front was only 1 piece it should be $50 not $100 and he said the one in front was $100 because it's leather. (I am not a specialist or anything but I thought it could be vinyl.... but I am not familiar with leather to know for sure....) anyway we tested the couch out and discussed it a little. We talked about how the one we currently have is pretty uncomfy (in my opinion) that because it's in 3 pieces and they are not properlly locked together it slides and stuff. Etc. We talked about how this one is a little smaller so it will seat one or two less people. I reminded her we don't often throw big parties thus requiring a mass amount of seating (just when family is all together) But we discussed how it is smaller and thus would open up the room even more (we recently removed a wall and put in new flooring making the house seem way bigger) Anyway I thought this couch was way more comfortable. One downside to it was it's color. Kinda a cream beige white or something like that. Not exactly kid friendly and it seemed to already have some evidence of spills and such. We discussed washing the cusion covers and even making a slip cover for the whole couch anyway.
Well we talked a bit. I liked the couch and I wasn't quite sure if my mom completely did or not. Now as far back as I can remember we have always had second hand living room furniture. The couches at least and we have had several couches!!! Anyway as I said I was not sure if my mom liked the couch or not and I told her we didn't have to get it if she didn't want to. Well after much deliberation and discussion she told the guy we were going to shop around but to hold the couch for us we would take it. I am still not sure if she likes it completely or not. She told the guy when we were paying that in her opinion we have better couches at the house already (I told her again if she didn't like it we didn't have to get it) I think a huge part of why she likes the one we already have/had was because it had a sofabed in it. But I personally can't even remember the last time it was used.... so it's not like we necessarily need a sofabed! It's also got 2 seats that recline.... although the buttons to recline either one don't work and so they sorta don't recline unless you want to physically pull them out to recline, or if you manage to put enough pressure in the crease of the chair fold to pop the recliner. (done frequently by standing in the chair to do something else and you suddenly fall because it reclines)
Anyway we got the new couches. I know a huge part of why my mom got it to replace the one we have was for me. She knows with my upcoming surgery I needed a more comfortable place to sit and to be able to recover! I didn't really want an ottoman to use because I needed to be able to fully support and elevate my leg. I was also worried about my nephews either hitting my leg or moving the ottoman. So like I said, my mom is amazing, she was willing to let me get a chaise and have to make room for it and then instead she got rid of couches she liked for other used ones so that I can be comfortable!! I know she would prefer new furniture all together but since we can't afford that this is what we got. I feel so loved because she was willing to make a major change such as the couches on my behalf! I just hope she doesn't regret that decision! The new couch thing is firm, but really comfy! It's nice and it really does open up the room more! Well it's late so I should be in bed! I just wanted to share how amazing and loving and sweet my mom is! I am so blessed to have her in my life!
Well we talked a bit. I liked the couch and I wasn't quite sure if my mom completely did or not. Now as far back as I can remember we have always had second hand living room furniture. The couches at least and we have had several couches!!! Anyway as I said I was not sure if my mom liked the couch or not and I told her we didn't have to get it if she didn't want to. Well after much deliberation and discussion she told the guy we were going to shop around but to hold the couch for us we would take it. I am still not sure if she likes it completely or not. She told the guy when we were paying that in her opinion we have better couches at the house already (I told her again if she didn't like it we didn't have to get it) I think a huge part of why she likes the one we already have/had was because it had a sofabed in it. But I personally can't even remember the last time it was used.... so it's not like we necessarily need a sofabed! It's also got 2 seats that recline.... although the buttons to recline either one don't work and so they sorta don't recline unless you want to physically pull them out to recline, or if you manage to put enough pressure in the crease of the chair fold to pop the recliner. (done frequently by standing in the chair to do something else and you suddenly fall because it reclines)
Anyway we got the new couches. I know a huge part of why my mom got it to replace the one we have was for me. She knows with my upcoming surgery I needed a more comfortable place to sit and to be able to recover! I didn't really want an ottoman to use because I needed to be able to fully support and elevate my leg. I was also worried about my nephews either hitting my leg or moving the ottoman. So like I said, my mom is amazing, she was willing to let me get a chaise and have to make room for it and then instead she got rid of couches she liked for other used ones so that I can be comfortable!! I know she would prefer new furniture all together but since we can't afford that this is what we got. I feel so loved because she was willing to make a major change such as the couches on my behalf! I just hope she doesn't regret that decision! The new couch thing is firm, but really comfy! It's nice and it really does open up the room more! Well it's late so I should be in bed! I just wanted to share how amazing and loving and sweet my mom is! I am so blessed to have her in my life!
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
NO Chaise.....
OK so a couple days ago I had a thought.... (and nope I didn't blow any fuses, before anybody gets any funny ideas to make fun of me) with my upcoming knee surgery I think it would be nice to have a chaise lounge style chair to use post-op. For me with my current knee condition I have a hard time getting comfortable on the couches at home. WHen I have the ACL reconstruction done I will have to basically keep my leg out in front of me constantly and elevate it regularly with ice and stuff. So since i can't get comfortable now on the couches I figured this will be worse after surgery. I knew awhile ago I had seen one at Big Lots (formally known as Pic N Save) that I had really liked and if I had the money then I probably would've bought it (it was $300). KNowing I still can't afford that much money today my friend Ang and I went thrift store shopping in the San Fernando Valley. We probably hit up 8-10 stores which really did a number on my knee (even with the cane) It wore me out too! I was (and still am) super tired!Then after we got back to Simi I went to 2 more thrift stores. I had NO luck finding one! Last night I was online for several hours checking all the websites of stores I thought I might find one in for a reasonable price... I even used the search engine for "cheap chaises" without finding anything. I checked the pennysaver online last night and when I searched for chaise I mostly got ads for diningroom tables!!! Very frustrating! So then tonight I looked again and found 1 for $150, but I don't even know if they still have it, if I will like it and if I really can afford it. I am hoping if it turns out I do like it, maybe if I offer them $100 cash on the spot they will accept it?? We shall see. I did also check many other websites and stores online tonight... everything I am finding is either for outdoor, doesn't look comfortable or usable, or is just way too expensive! I really hope it works out so that I can be comfy!
However tonight after much more unsuccessful chaise searches online I have been considering other possibilities (and searching a few of them too) for instance I was looking at oversized bean bag chairs. But that may pose a problem when it comes to getting up..... My mom said that a toddler bed might be a possibility (we could re-inforce it for my weight) although I think the height of a toddler bed my present a problem for me with getting up or down. But we still have not done any garage sale searching or otherwise. Maybe if I can find a nice futon or something that might be a nice possibility also. If I did find a nice futon it could be double helpful if I have a problem getting onto my high bed :) I don't know like my mom said tonight I don't even have my surgery scheduled so I have a little time, although I don't want to procrastinate! Plus I will likely be taking my EMT recertification course at the end of the month so I can do it before I am unable to walk and so I won't be able to look then and the surgery is likely to be scheduled soon thereafter!
However tonight after much more unsuccessful chaise searches online I have been considering other possibilities (and searching a few of them too) for instance I was looking at oversized bean bag chairs. But that may pose a problem when it comes to getting up..... My mom said that a toddler bed might be a possibility (we could re-inforce it for my weight) although I think the height of a toddler bed my present a problem for me with getting up or down. But we still have not done any garage sale searching or otherwise. Maybe if I can find a nice futon or something that might be a nice possibility also. If I did find a nice futon it could be double helpful if I have a problem getting onto my high bed :) I don't know like my mom said tonight I don't even have my surgery scheduled so I have a little time, although I don't want to procrastinate! Plus I will likely be taking my EMT recertification course at the end of the month so I can do it before I am unable to walk and so I won't be able to look then and the surgery is likely to be scheduled soon thereafter!
Friday, January 9, 2009
My Cane and I
Ok so as much as I don't want to feel or look like an old lady (or like I am just playing around faking or something) I decided to do what my doctor suggested and use a cane until the surgery instead of the crutches.... but I don't like the one my dad has (I used it once for the Temple and preferred the crutches) and so I knew if I was going to use one I was going to have to find one I liked more than dad's and buy it. But then again because I didn't want to look old etc I figured I would get it and sew a cover for it so it would be more "hip" or something. Well last night I went to teach an investigator with the missionaries and after I really didn't want to go home so I went to Wally World (aka Walmart incase you don't know the lingo) I went to the pharmacy section and they had a total of 3 or 4 canes to choose from. One was a fold up cane...ummm no thanks I don't need it to collapse on me. ANother was one that was silver and had the big thing at the bottom instead of just the tip.... ummm way to elderly for me..... and then they had two other ones that were adjustable in height. One was a funky purple-ish type metal colored one that had a curved handle.... that one was similiar to my dad's because of the handle which was what I didn't like about it. The last one was a black adjustable one with a more flat handle with a padded cover. This one seemed good to me and it was only $11.17 plus tax. I'm not really sure how they came up with that price but it seemed way reasonable and I chose to buy it. When I finished walking around and they were about to close I purchased my stuff ( I also bought a few cards some diet coke and a couple other little things) I came home. I decided I needed to adjust the height of my new cane and then figure out how to decorate it. But the darn thing wouldn't adjust. I tried and tried to pull the bottom part out, I even put my foot on the handle and pulled with my hands but it was not budging. My mom tried to use the rubber things you use to grip a jar to open it easier and it still wouldn't go. So she pulled one end and I the other and yup you guessed it no budging!!! So I gave up and figured today I would exchange it.
This afternoon after donating blood, picking up Christian from school and running a couple other errands I went back to Wally World to exchange the cane for one I could actually adjust to my height. I went to get another one and there was only one other one like I had purchased and it too wouldn't budge. So I went ahead and took it to the return counter and told the lady it was the same way and unless she could find someone who was able to adjust it I just wanted to return the one I bought. She took it to some of the guys and they were like "it's not moving" so I got my $11.98 back (that was the total with tax) and we left. I decided since Rite Aid was on LA ave on the way home I would stop and see what they had. They had a HUGE selection!!! They had so many canes they were in two places! I already knew I wanted one that was more flat on top then curved. So I was looking at an adjustable one that had two color options....pink or blue. I thought about buying the pink one.... they also had several that had a swirled type design on them and there were several color options: red, black, blue, green. I kinda liked the black one, but I wish they maybe had a purple. They had one that had some funky looking plant leave things on it.... it was pretty hideous looking. They had one with the lights of Las Vegas all over it. It even said Las Vegas.... Christian liked that one. I promptly reminded him I don't gamble and so I didn't really care for it. They had an ugly plaid one and a few other ones... and they had a red-ish colored polka dot one. Now red isn't really my favorite color.... if you ask I will tell you that my favorite colors are purple and blue. I don't say it's my favorite but I also like pink. But I liked the polka dots even though the base color was red. I thought it was less elderly-like and kinda fun. I also liked the plain pink one. I could easily wrap it with some ribbon and it'd be more girlie and fun too. Both of them had a flatter type handle which is what I knew I wanted. The handle on the pink one was kind of contoured for the palm and fingers and it said on the tag it was "easy on the wrist" the handle was rubber like. The dotted one was also flatter on top (I didn't look at any curved ones) but it wasn't as contoured as the pink one for fingers, but it did have padding like the cheaper wally world black one.
I could see several price tags for the canes that mostly said $21.99 and I wasn't sure if I liked that price. But then when I really thought about it I knew it meant at least a couple weeks without crutches until my surgery. I also knew that when I have the surgery I know I will have to go back to the crutches but in time as I recover I may find a time when I am not quite as steady as I can be but not wanting them then either, I would again be able to use the cane. So I can use it now and then and it would overall be a good investment, maybe even when I really am elderly! I knew I didn't want to pay more than the $21.99 but I couldn't find the tags for the exact canes I was looking at. I decided I would go to the register and see how much they each were, and see if one happened to be cheaper than the other and that would be my decision maker. I knew that if they were the same I would have to decide. So while walking to the register I kinda walked a little with both of them to see which I liked more. I kinda liked them both. The contours were nice and it felt comfortable, but the padding was also really nice..... as I waited in line I decided that if they were the same price I liked the polka dots more. The padding was one of the big decision makers, because I thought even though the contours were nice the rubber may get slippery if my hands happened to sweat or something, plus it just wasn't padded! Otherwise they almost felt the same when it came to use. The finger spots weren't as obvious when using the cane anyway. Plus the dots need less decoration for a younger lady like myself to not feel as old with the cane! They were both the same price of $21.99 so I bought the polka dots! I was thinking I may even get some streamers like you see in the handlebars of kids bikes and attach it to the back of my cane handle :) Anyway I attached pictures of my new walking aide. It's kind of nice to be able to retire the crutches for a brief spell even though I know they will be back in my life sooner rather than later! Such is life for a klutz as myself! I can't believe I have been walking with them since like Sept! It's rediculous! Often I would just leave the crutches in the car because it was easier. But easier at the time often meant pain later. But now with the cane it's less bulky and still easier but hopefully also still more pain friendly. Life is good.... at least hopefully getting better! Even with the crazy week I have had so far I do feel a little better now than I have been. Less tears too!
Well I should be getting to bed. I have my brother in law's Sheriff Reserve Academy graduation to attend in the morning! TTFN!
This afternoon after donating blood, picking up Christian from school and running a couple other errands I went back to Wally World to exchange the cane for one I could actually adjust to my height. I went to get another one and there was only one other one like I had purchased and it too wouldn't budge. So I went ahead and took it to the return counter and told the lady it was the same way and unless she could find someone who was able to adjust it I just wanted to return the one I bought. She took it to some of the guys and they were like "it's not moving" so I got my $11.98 back (that was the total with tax) and we left. I decided since Rite Aid was on LA ave on the way home I would stop and see what they had. They had a HUGE selection!!! They had so many canes they were in two places! I already knew I wanted one that was more flat on top then curved. So I was looking at an adjustable one that had two color options....pink or blue. I thought about buying the pink one.... they also had several that had a swirled type design on them and there were several color options: red, black, blue, green. I kinda liked the black one, but I wish they maybe had a purple. They had one that had some funky looking plant leave things on it.... it was pretty hideous looking. They had one with the lights of Las Vegas all over it. It even said Las Vegas.... Christian liked that one. I promptly reminded him I don't gamble and so I didn't really care for it. They had an ugly plaid one and a few other ones... and they had a red-ish colored polka dot one. Now red isn't really my favorite color.... if you ask I will tell you that my favorite colors are purple and blue. I don't say it's my favorite but I also like pink. But I liked the polka dots even though the base color was red. I thought it was less elderly-like and kinda fun. I also liked the plain pink one. I could easily wrap it with some ribbon and it'd be more girlie and fun too. Both of them had a flatter type handle which is what I knew I wanted. The handle on the pink one was kind of contoured for the palm and fingers and it said on the tag it was "easy on the wrist" the handle was rubber like. The dotted one was also flatter on top (I didn't look at any curved ones) but it wasn't as contoured as the pink one for fingers, but it did have padding like the cheaper wally world black one.
I could see several price tags for the canes that mostly said $21.99 and I wasn't sure if I liked that price. But then when I really thought about it I knew it meant at least a couple weeks without crutches until my surgery. I also knew that when I have the surgery I know I will have to go back to the crutches but in time as I recover I may find a time when I am not quite as steady as I can be but not wanting them then either, I would again be able to use the cane. So I can use it now and then and it would overall be a good investment, maybe even when I really am elderly! I knew I didn't want to pay more than the $21.99 but I couldn't find the tags for the exact canes I was looking at. I decided I would go to the register and see how much they each were, and see if one happened to be cheaper than the other and that would be my decision maker. I knew that if they were the same I would have to decide. So while walking to the register I kinda walked a little with both of them to see which I liked more. I kinda liked them both. The contours were nice and it felt comfortable, but the padding was also really nice..... as I waited in line I decided that if they were the same price I liked the polka dots more. The padding was one of the big decision makers, because I thought even though the contours were nice the rubber may get slippery if my hands happened to sweat or something, plus it just wasn't padded! Otherwise they almost felt the same when it came to use. The finger spots weren't as obvious when using the cane anyway. Plus the dots need less decoration for a younger lady like myself to not feel as old with the cane! They were both the same price of $21.99 so I bought the polka dots! I was thinking I may even get some streamers like you see in the handlebars of kids bikes and attach it to the back of my cane handle :) Anyway I attached pictures of my new walking aide. It's kind of nice to be able to retire the crutches for a brief spell even though I know they will be back in my life sooner rather than later! Such is life for a klutz as myself! I can't believe I have been walking with them since like Sept! It's rediculous! Often I would just leave the crutches in the car because it was easier. But easier at the time often meant pain later. But now with the cane it's less bulky and still easier but hopefully also still more pain friendly. Life is good.... at least hopefully getting better! Even with the crazy week I have had so far I do feel a little better now than I have been. Less tears too!
Well I should be getting to bed. I have my brother in law's Sheriff Reserve Academy graduation to attend in the morning! TTFN!
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Happy New Year....
Or something like that! It's only been 8 days so far but I am not sure I am enjoying 2009 yet. The first few days were good. I'm still out of work so I have just been at home, nothing too exciting or anything. I never really planned any resolutions, I already started trying to lose weight (and succeeding so far, a little more than 10 pounds but because of the knee it's all been diet changes only, no exercise) I wanted to start before the new year because I really need to lose weight (lots of it) and then I was losing during the holidays instead of gaining. It actually felt nice to weigh in after both Thanksgiving and Christmas and have the number on the scale be down. Plus most people forget about their new years stuff by like FEb or Mar and this way I am already forming the new habits (again...) and am not planning on giving up.... ever! But generally since I am always thinking about losing weight I don't normally tell people I am trying to do it when I am (except some close family and friends) so when asked about any goals for 09 I just have told people my goal is to get rid of the crutches and return to work. Which are also things that weigh heavily on my mind especially lately!
On that note I already kinda get to do one of those things, but only if I choose to and only briefly than I have to go back... I was at the doctor on Mon. He did a test called the KT test. I am not sure what the KT stand for but he told me it was to check the stability in my knee. It said there are not any magic numbers he was looking for but that what he would do was check the R (good) leg against my L (bad) leg. To see how it was. He didn't tell me any numbers he got for either leg, but he did tell me that there was a significant difference and so it shows that my L leg is definately unstable. He actually told me he is surprised that I don't have moments where it feels unstable or gives out on me or otherwise. When I went to that appointment I was expecting him to suggest another operation. I was thinking he was going to say that he would like to go in arthoscopically again and look around and check the MCL and everything else and then fix anything he could find wrong. Instead what he told me is kinda my only option (since I've already done the injections and stayed off it etc) is ACL reconstructive surgery. He had mentioned that last summer when I originally re-injured it that if there was another surgery it would likely be an ACL repair. But most of this time they have been treating the MCL and so thats why I was thinking the arthoscopy. Anyway he said that normally they won't go in for an ACL repair on a complaint of pain (which is my biggest issue) and that normally it is for the complaint of instability (which I have but am not complaining of) But he said he feels that there is a good chance that even though it isn't my complaint that if we fix the instability it may decrease the pain. He thinks it may be a deferred pain or something. He did say that there is a chance that fixing the ACL may not resolve my problems and I may still be in pain down the road. I told him I am willing to try because I really want to fix it and return to work. He said either way in the long run having it more stable will be beneficial. So it was set. He is ordering me a knee brace that I will wear after the surgery and was going to request insurance authorization. Once it is authorized and I have the brace I can set the surgery date.
So it goes.... I am going to have a second knee operation in a year. I am not fully excited about it I mean who would be glad to be having an operation. But I am hoping that it makes a difference. I know that the recovery is going to be long and hard. I was reading online and some sites I looked at said 4-6 months recovery some said 6-9 and one even said it could be up to a year. It says normally the rehab and exercises start the day after the operation to regain motion and stuff. So I have a long road ahead of me.... This got me thinking a lot. Tues morning in the shower I thought.... I am going to need help to shower again.... I was thinking how difficult it was for me to get up and go to the bathroom during the night after my last knee surgery (which I seemed to have to do more often than normal for some reason) and this one is a lot more involved. I am really going to have to humble myself and be willing to accept some help. I may even have to carpool to church and stuff because with the last surgery I had trouble getting into the drivers side of my car so I may not be able to this time as soon as before. It is really going to change some things for me. So even though I have been through several surgeries before (tubes in my ears when I was 6, wrist surgery 4x, wisdom teeth extraction and 1 previous knee operation) and I remember all of them, I am suddenly feeling a lot more scared about this one than any of the others. Which is abnormal for me! I have always been nervous about my operations ( I remember all of them) but this is the first time I have felt worried about it. Last night, not only did I go to bed early but I cried myself to sleep....So it's a little intimidating for me! Although as I was saying my goal is to get rid of the crutches and return to work.... my doctor told me I can switch from the crutches to a cane until I have the surgery if I want. But then I know I will have them back after the operation unfortunately! So if I can find one I like I may do that... but if I do I am thinking I also want to make a fabric cover for it so it isn't like an old person cane. I want it to be cool. So people know I am not an old lady :) So the past 3 days have been a little hard for me... freaking out and stuff! But since I am the one who helps around the house the most I have been trying extra hard to do what I can now. SInce I know after the surgery I will just add to my mom's burden. I feel bad for her and all she does and I know that adding me to the problems won't be easy and I won't be able to help as much (if at all) after the surgery so I want to help more now! I mostly just don't want to be another burden to my mom!
But I recently started to re-read the Harry Potter books. I had wanted to back in like AUg-Sep I was thinking about it because I knew the newest movie was supposed to come out around Nov. But then they decided to delay the release date until the summer to get more people to the theater to watch it. (it's all about money to some folks) anyways I hadn't started my reading them again yet. But then on the way to Ut with R after thanksgiving we were reading the first one in the car together. (We took turns reading while the other drove) and so we together got a good start on them. After I came home I got mine out and finished it. Well then she went on to number 2 and I kept delaying still. But then because she told me she got to number 3 I knew I had to catch up. So then when I got around to reading number 2 she told me she is in number 4. So in the past few days I have read number 2 and 3. And later I plan to start 4. It's kinda fun that it's sorta an unmentioned competition (well we've sorta texted about it) Anyways because I have been reading so much again my family is questioning my motives for reading them again. Because apparantly just liking to read and then re-read books is not ok?? I can't afford to go buy new books constantly like I usually do and when I like a book I read fast so I would constantly be at the library if I was borrowing them! Anyways I need to figure out what I would like to read post-op because aside from movies and TV I will be bedridden and need something to do while I am down! SO if you have any good book suggestions let me know! Maybe I will re-read the Lord of the Rings, those took me about 3 weeks before so that would be a good one! If I can remember where I put them of course!
Well thats about it for my not so happy (YET) new year! Hope all of yours are better!
On that note I already kinda get to do one of those things, but only if I choose to and only briefly than I have to go back... I was at the doctor on Mon. He did a test called the KT test. I am not sure what the KT stand for but he told me it was to check the stability in my knee. It said there are not any magic numbers he was looking for but that what he would do was check the R (good) leg against my L (bad) leg. To see how it was. He didn't tell me any numbers he got for either leg, but he did tell me that there was a significant difference and so it shows that my L leg is definately unstable. He actually told me he is surprised that I don't have moments where it feels unstable or gives out on me or otherwise. When I went to that appointment I was expecting him to suggest another operation. I was thinking he was going to say that he would like to go in arthoscopically again and look around and check the MCL and everything else and then fix anything he could find wrong. Instead what he told me is kinda my only option (since I've already done the injections and stayed off it etc) is ACL reconstructive surgery. He had mentioned that last summer when I originally re-injured it that if there was another surgery it would likely be an ACL repair. But most of this time they have been treating the MCL and so thats why I was thinking the arthoscopy. Anyway he said that normally they won't go in for an ACL repair on a complaint of pain (which is my biggest issue) and that normally it is for the complaint of instability (which I have but am not complaining of) But he said he feels that there is a good chance that even though it isn't my complaint that if we fix the instability it may decrease the pain. He thinks it may be a deferred pain or something. He did say that there is a chance that fixing the ACL may not resolve my problems and I may still be in pain down the road. I told him I am willing to try because I really want to fix it and return to work. He said either way in the long run having it more stable will be beneficial. So it was set. He is ordering me a knee brace that I will wear after the surgery and was going to request insurance authorization. Once it is authorized and I have the brace I can set the surgery date.
So it goes.... I am going to have a second knee operation in a year. I am not fully excited about it I mean who would be glad to be having an operation. But I am hoping that it makes a difference. I know that the recovery is going to be long and hard. I was reading online and some sites I looked at said 4-6 months recovery some said 6-9 and one even said it could be up to a year. It says normally the rehab and exercises start the day after the operation to regain motion and stuff. So I have a long road ahead of me.... This got me thinking a lot. Tues morning in the shower I thought.... I am going to need help to shower again.... I was thinking how difficult it was for me to get up and go to the bathroom during the night after my last knee surgery (which I seemed to have to do more often than normal for some reason) and this one is a lot more involved. I am really going to have to humble myself and be willing to accept some help. I may even have to carpool to church and stuff because with the last surgery I had trouble getting into the drivers side of my car so I may not be able to this time as soon as before. It is really going to change some things for me. So even though I have been through several surgeries before (tubes in my ears when I was 6, wrist surgery 4x, wisdom teeth extraction and 1 previous knee operation) and I remember all of them, I am suddenly feeling a lot more scared about this one than any of the others. Which is abnormal for me! I have always been nervous about my operations ( I remember all of them) but this is the first time I have felt worried about it. Last night, not only did I go to bed early but I cried myself to sleep....So it's a little intimidating for me! Although as I was saying my goal is to get rid of the crutches and return to work.... my doctor told me I can switch from the crutches to a cane until I have the surgery if I want. But then I know I will have them back after the operation unfortunately! So if I can find one I like I may do that... but if I do I am thinking I also want to make a fabric cover for it so it isn't like an old person cane. I want it to be cool. So people know I am not an old lady :) So the past 3 days have been a little hard for me... freaking out and stuff! But since I am the one who helps around the house the most I have been trying extra hard to do what I can now. SInce I know after the surgery I will just add to my mom's burden. I feel bad for her and all she does and I know that adding me to the problems won't be easy and I won't be able to help as much (if at all) after the surgery so I want to help more now! I mostly just don't want to be another burden to my mom!
But I recently started to re-read the Harry Potter books. I had wanted to back in like AUg-Sep I was thinking about it because I knew the newest movie was supposed to come out around Nov. But then they decided to delay the release date until the summer to get more people to the theater to watch it. (it's all about money to some folks) anyways I hadn't started my reading them again yet. But then on the way to Ut with R after thanksgiving we were reading the first one in the car together. (We took turns reading while the other drove) and so we together got a good start on them. After I came home I got mine out and finished it. Well then she went on to number 2 and I kept delaying still. But then because she told me she got to number 3 I knew I had to catch up. So then when I got around to reading number 2 she told me she is in number 4. So in the past few days I have read number 2 and 3. And later I plan to start 4. It's kinda fun that it's sorta an unmentioned competition (well we've sorta texted about it) Anyways because I have been reading so much again my family is questioning my motives for reading them again. Because apparantly just liking to read and then re-read books is not ok?? I can't afford to go buy new books constantly like I usually do and when I like a book I read fast so I would constantly be at the library if I was borrowing them! Anyways I need to figure out what I would like to read post-op because aside from movies and TV I will be bedridden and need something to do while I am down! SO if you have any good book suggestions let me know! Maybe I will re-read the Lord of the Rings, those took me about 3 weeks before so that would be a good one! If I can remember where I put them of course!
Well thats about it for my not so happy (YET) new year! Hope all of yours are better!
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Looking Back
Ok so I feel kinda bad... I wrote a Christmas letter this year to send with my cards (as I normally do) but in it I feel like I mostly complained. I mentioned that most of my year I struggled because of my knee injury. I mentioned that my dad had major open heart surgery that we knew was coming and I mentioned that my nephew was born. I learned a lot this year about overcoming trials but I didn't really talk about that in my letter. In fact I almost didn't even write or send a letter. But after I had written it and printed several copies and had many sealed in envelopes ready to be mailed I realized I had so much more I could've said. It is true that I struggled a lot this year (in fact I still am and I wonder how long into 2009 I will continue to struggle) but despite the knee injury there were a lot of amazing experiences I had this year. In fact if it wasn't for the fact that I have been out of work as much as I have I probably wouldn't have gotten to experience as much as I did. So here it goes a little more detailed review:
Jan/Feb I was seeing the ortho for my knee injury (it happened a year ago in Dec) and so I was still working and figuring out treatments and stuff. Late in Jan my ward went to Mount Pinos to the snow. I went sledding down the hill only once (since climbing up the hill wasn't feeling very good for my already injured knee) but I did also get to make some snow angels and have a few fights. As I trudged through the knee high (for me) fresh snow on the ground I gained a greater appreciation for the early pioneers of the church who endured through snow storms with sick families and hand carts and so much more. I could barely handle it for half a day in a "fun" environment. They overcame so much for their freedom of religion and I am so blessed because of it. R came home from her mission and we began hanging out again and got to be really close friends.... almost like twins! This turned out to be nice since V had moved back in Aug so I needed someone nearby. Because we would carpool she got me going to institute and stuff that i probably would've continued to avoid before.
March: Knee operation on the 13th. I worked up until the day before. I was so greatful to be getting it fixed and couldn't wait to get back to work! But this was also a great month because this was when my nephew Isaiah was born on the 24th. It was a blessing to be out of work and able to see him frequently as well as his older brother Elijah! I love my nephews so much! During my time after my operation I got to go to Disneyland several times, it was different going in a wheelchair but I loved the convenience it provided for the lines. I also got to go to Utah for a few days with R to see V and go through the Temple with her! It was great! While there we picked up R's piano and after returning home she started teaching me to play! I have always wanted to learn to play the piano!
April-May I was still recovering from the operation so I was home a lot with my family (and occasionally at Disneyland) and I was doing all I could to go back to work including physical therapy with a therapist that gave me the creeps! ...I got to go back on May 19th! I was so excited to be back. There were quite a few new faces but with one of my new co-workers I had some really great missionary discussions and was able to share my beliefs with him. It was incredible. Working was great!
June... still working until while at home one evening I slipped when i stepped into the bathroom. I twisted my knee and hoped it was ok. At first it seemed like it was but within a week I was starting to get really stiff and eventually the pain returned. I had to leave work early because it was so bad i was worried I might drop a patient. I ended up going back out of work on the 19th. Exactly 4 weeks after having returned to work! :( But I got to take another half day disneyland trip with R and then we went to Medieval Times for her birthday! It was a lot of fun. We sat center stage in the very front table! It was so much fun!
July: Can't remember anything too exciting then..... R was on vacation for several weeks so my piano lessons were put on hold.... but she sent me lots of postcards to add to my collection :)
Aug: R moved to Utah.... (one year after V had....) it was sad, it felt like losing a sister... as well as my piano teacher... But then my ward made a trip to the Kern River. We camped for 3 days and did some tubing. I decided I was only going to make one tube trip down river since I knew I have a knee injury and they said it would be about a 40 minute float. Well it ended up being like 4.5 hours and after that I was pretty water logged and still not where I needed to be so I ended up hiking up the mountain to the road and walking until I got picked up. Needless to say I end up being more sore than anticipated but I love camping and during the trip I got to be an EMT when not only did someone fall and cut his chin open ( I took him to the ER) but several people got bee stings and otherwise. Not that I wanted people injured but it felt nice to be able to help again! Anyways the trip was amazing despite the too long tube trip and sunburn!
Sep: I got to go up north and spend several days with my cousin and his family. He took me fishing! I loved it! I hadn't been fishing in so long and I learned so much! It was nice to be able to spend most of the night on the boat with him I learned a lot about him I didn't know before. Even though we each only caught one fish (he caught a bass he had to throw back, and I caught one trout, which I ate the next night for dinner) it was a great trip for me! I loved every minute I got to be there and cannot wait to go again. This was also the month my dad had his operation. We were worried since it was a major operation but luckily all went well. He spent a month in the hospital during which time I got to do a lot of babysitting of my nephews. I love them so much, although it didn't help my knee injury much... I loved the bonding time we got! During this time my family also started some remodeling of our house. The elders came over and tore down 2 non-weight bearing walls! It really opened up the space a lot. We also took out all the carpet and linoleum around that time.
Oct-Nov: Still knee stuff to deal with, but it was a great Thanksgiving, so much to be thankful for, family especially with my Dad home and my nephews! There is a lot of blessings to acknowldge. I think my dad went back into hospital once during this time too.... but I don't recall why.... but he was able to get released a few days later.... I also got to take another trip to Utah after Thanksgiving. Rand V were home for the holiday and R invited me to drive back to Utah with her. It was a short but fun trip! I was so thanksful for her providing me the opportunity. She also took her piano with her :( not that I have had any lessons, but it was good to continue to practice what I could so I don't lose what I've learned and hopefully be able to improve.
Dec: We got hardwood flooring installed. It looks amazing! My dad spent a few days in the hospital again, a week before Christmas, this time for pancreatitis. But he also has gallstones and will need his gallbladder removed. But thankfully they released him and he was here for Christmas. He goes in to schedule the surgery soon... I got a new keyboard that I wanted for Christmas. So I get to continue to practice and even learn. This keyboard has a lot of features including several learning modes so it is kinda like a teacher! It will hopefully help me reach my goal of being able to easily play most stuff I want to on the piano someday! Both R and V were here for most of the week, so that was a lot of fun!
Well that is a more precise looking back review of 2008 than my brief little Christmas letter had been. I have had a lot of good and bad experiences as always and have continued to learn and grow! I miss working and even though I am stil having knee problems I hope to be able to work again soon! I love the gospel, I love my family and I love all my friends and my blog readers! You are all amazing! Well have a wonderful new year!~ I know I hope too!
Love ya Renee
Jan/Feb I was seeing the ortho for my knee injury (it happened a year ago in Dec) and so I was still working and figuring out treatments and stuff. Late in Jan my ward went to Mount Pinos to the snow. I went sledding down the hill only once (since climbing up the hill wasn't feeling very good for my already injured knee) but I did also get to make some snow angels and have a few fights. As I trudged through the knee high (for me) fresh snow on the ground I gained a greater appreciation for the early pioneers of the church who endured through snow storms with sick families and hand carts and so much more. I could barely handle it for half a day in a "fun" environment. They overcame so much for their freedom of religion and I am so blessed because of it. R came home from her mission and we began hanging out again and got to be really close friends.... almost like twins! This turned out to be nice since V had moved back in Aug so I needed someone nearby. Because we would carpool she got me going to institute and stuff that i probably would've continued to avoid before.
March: Knee operation on the 13th. I worked up until the day before. I was so greatful to be getting it fixed and couldn't wait to get back to work! But this was also a great month because this was when my nephew Isaiah was born on the 24th. It was a blessing to be out of work and able to see him frequently as well as his older brother Elijah! I love my nephews so much! During my time after my operation I got to go to Disneyland several times, it was different going in a wheelchair but I loved the convenience it provided for the lines. I also got to go to Utah for a few days with R to see V and go through the Temple with her! It was great! While there we picked up R's piano and after returning home she started teaching me to play! I have always wanted to learn to play the piano!
April-May I was still recovering from the operation so I was home a lot with my family (and occasionally at Disneyland) and I was doing all I could to go back to work including physical therapy with a therapist that gave me the creeps! ...I got to go back on May 19th! I was so excited to be back. There were quite a few new faces but with one of my new co-workers I had some really great missionary discussions and was able to share my beliefs with him. It was incredible. Working was great!
June... still working until while at home one evening I slipped when i stepped into the bathroom. I twisted my knee and hoped it was ok. At first it seemed like it was but within a week I was starting to get really stiff and eventually the pain returned. I had to leave work early because it was so bad i was worried I might drop a patient. I ended up going back out of work on the 19th. Exactly 4 weeks after having returned to work! :( But I got to take another half day disneyland trip with R and then we went to Medieval Times for her birthday! It was a lot of fun. We sat center stage in the very front table! It was so much fun!
July: Can't remember anything too exciting then..... R was on vacation for several weeks so my piano lessons were put on hold.... but she sent me lots of postcards to add to my collection :)
Aug: R moved to Utah.... (one year after V had....) it was sad, it felt like losing a sister... as well as my piano teacher... But then my ward made a trip to the Kern River. We camped for 3 days and did some tubing. I decided I was only going to make one tube trip down river since I knew I have a knee injury and they said it would be about a 40 minute float. Well it ended up being like 4.5 hours and after that I was pretty water logged and still not where I needed to be so I ended up hiking up the mountain to the road and walking until I got picked up. Needless to say I end up being more sore than anticipated but I love camping and during the trip I got to be an EMT when not only did someone fall and cut his chin open ( I took him to the ER) but several people got bee stings and otherwise. Not that I wanted people injured but it felt nice to be able to help again! Anyways the trip was amazing despite the too long tube trip and sunburn!
Sep: I got to go up north and spend several days with my cousin and his family. He took me fishing! I loved it! I hadn't been fishing in so long and I learned so much! It was nice to be able to spend most of the night on the boat with him I learned a lot about him I didn't know before. Even though we each only caught one fish (he caught a bass he had to throw back, and I caught one trout, which I ate the next night for dinner) it was a great trip for me! I loved every minute I got to be there and cannot wait to go again. This was also the month my dad had his operation. We were worried since it was a major operation but luckily all went well. He spent a month in the hospital during which time I got to do a lot of babysitting of my nephews. I love them so much, although it didn't help my knee injury much... I loved the bonding time we got! During this time my family also started some remodeling of our house. The elders came over and tore down 2 non-weight bearing walls! It really opened up the space a lot. We also took out all the carpet and linoleum around that time.
Oct-Nov: Still knee stuff to deal with, but it was a great Thanksgiving, so much to be thankful for, family especially with my Dad home and my nephews! There is a lot of blessings to acknowldge. I think my dad went back into hospital once during this time too.... but I don't recall why.... but he was able to get released a few days later.... I also got to take another trip to Utah after Thanksgiving. Rand V were home for the holiday and R invited me to drive back to Utah with her. It was a short but fun trip! I was so thanksful for her providing me the opportunity. She also took her piano with her :( not that I have had any lessons, but it was good to continue to practice what I could so I don't lose what I've learned and hopefully be able to improve.
Dec: We got hardwood flooring installed. It looks amazing! My dad spent a few days in the hospital again, a week before Christmas, this time for pancreatitis. But he also has gallstones and will need his gallbladder removed. But thankfully they released him and he was here for Christmas. He goes in to schedule the surgery soon... I got a new keyboard that I wanted for Christmas. So I get to continue to practice and even learn. This keyboard has a lot of features including several learning modes so it is kinda like a teacher! It will hopefully help me reach my goal of being able to easily play most stuff I want to on the piano someday! Both R and V were here for most of the week, so that was a lot of fun!
Well that is a more precise looking back review of 2008 than my brief little Christmas letter had been. I have had a lot of good and bad experiences as always and have continued to learn and grow! I miss working and even though I am stil having knee problems I hope to be able to work again soon! I love the gospel, I love my family and I love all my friends and my blog readers! You are all amazing! Well have a wonderful new year!~ I know I hope too!
Love ya Renee
Monday, December 15, 2008
Shattered
Ok so in the past week and a half or so I fell into the "Twilight" craze. I love to read and the movie looked interesting enough so I decided I wanted to read the book before watching the movie (since usually the book is like a bajillion times better) So I read it the first 150 pages or so I was like "whatever no big deal" I was interested but I didn't feel like everyone had been saying that "I just couldn't put it down" I was enjoying the book but did not feel drawn to it. In fact I had at that point put it down while I was on the plane with like 45 minutes left on my flight. Then later picked it up again and put it down almost immediately, then up again later. I wasn't drawn. But I had time on my hands and had already finished re-reading the first Harry Potter I had started while on my trip. I wasn't eager to be with my family (within 5 min of being home my Dad was driving me insane) so i was lying on my bed reading. I was texting with a friend and was telling her it seemed interesting enough but that I felt I could put it down. (that's how I remember being at at least page 150) anyways I was bored so I kept reading. I guess after the first 150 pages the "can't put it down feeling" hit me. I stayed up way later reading that night and only went to bed because I was getting so tired it was hard to read. I finished the book the moment I had the chance the next day. But then because I had not received my check yet I had to wait to read the next one. I had gone to the library to check it out but with no luck. I was disappointed and then eventually my money came. I went and bought the rest of the series and in the past 4 days have been doing a lot of late night reading. I have been starting in the evening and reading until I can't stay awake anymore in the early morning usually only leaving a little left. I just stopped to get ready for bed a little bit ago and for some reason decided to go online instead of to sleep....
anyways here is where the shattering comes into play.... there was a returned missionary who spoke at church today. He served in Washington State. He even went to Forks, WS where the Twilight series is based in the novels. ANyways he said at church that there are NO vampires in Forks! I was shattered, I mean how can this series of books about vampires and werewolves not be true??? I thought I was going to cry?? Well I could've been like 3 chapters closer to the end by now but I should be snoozing away so goodnight! Oh and btw I was kidding I knew the story was fiction so I wasn't expecting there to really be any vampires in Forks.... I am still not sure of the werewolves though :)
anyways here is where the shattering comes into play.... there was a returned missionary who spoke at church today. He served in Washington State. He even went to Forks, WS where the Twilight series is based in the novels. ANyways he said at church that there are NO vampires in Forks! I was shattered, I mean how can this series of books about vampires and werewolves not be true??? I thought I was going to cry?? Well I could've been like 3 chapters closer to the end by now but I should be snoozing away so goodnight! Oh and btw I was kidding I knew the story was fiction so I wasn't expecting there to really be any vampires in Forks.... I am still not sure of the werewolves though :)
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Short note....
To let all my fans out there (all like maybe 10 of you if I am lucky) I am still alive. I would say alive and kicking... but with the whole knee thing there isn't much kicking going on. I am thinking though that I would like to try and kick things up a notch or two. It still seems as if I get sore when I do stuff but I have been losing weight (I am down almost 11 pounds now) and I really want to increase my exercise. Since now there basically is none because of the knee.... I am thinking I may start trying to ride my exercise bike a little. But my plan is to take some tylenol before I start and only do maybe 10 or 15 min (if I can last that long pain free) I will do it with no resistance and then as soon as I get off I will ice my knee to hopefully prevent any swelling.... if there is increased pain I will then take a pain pill... and or quit my bike riding. I shall see how it all goes... if I even do it.... but I do want to if I can make the time! Well here's the end of my short note. Even though I am not blogging as much I am still alive!
Sunday, December 7, 2008
Trial and failure.....
SO I have been walking with crutches now since I think around September-ish and it isn't exactly my preference. By far it is more of a nuisance than anything but I have my good days and my bad. Generally when walking around the house because I am usually walking shorter distances and am up for a lesser amount of time I just walk. Then when I go anywhere I always take the crutches, and then if I am shopping and they have one I will generally use an electric wheelchair. (I am quite a pro now, I can make a 3 point turn in a store isle without knocking stuff off the shelves.... although occasionally I misjudge a turn but whatever...anyways.....) but last night I went to a friends house for visiting teaching. It was fun but then we decided to go to the church and watch part of the christmas program and look at the creche displays. I had brought my crutches to the house but left them in the car (considering it was going to be like home and I wasn't going to be doing much walking) but then when we were going to the church I decided to kinda go without. I figured it still wasn't a lot of walking, it is not like a trip to costco where who knows how long you will be up and about. So I went. After walking the displays a little I was getting uncomfortable but it wasn't bad. More like a stiffness and a little ache no big deal. Life goes on. Well then today all day long I have been getting really sharp knee pains. I don't know if it is connected with the walking last night without them... The pains today have been worse than anything I can recall in awhile, and the worse part about it was they were originating from a different spot in my knee than where most of my pain has been. Since June when I went out of work and back on disability the majority of my pain has come from the inside area of my knee. Today it seems to be below the kneecap mostly. I don't really know what to make of it and it scares me a lot. I just recently got another cortisone injection and was really starting to feel that maybe it was improving and now I am doubtful again! I really hate this roller coaster I am on! I had kind of thought about not bringing them in for church Sun but now I am realizing I better not give up on them quite yet. Also since church seems to be somewhere that it gets to be sore lately in general anyway. I better also make sure there are some pain pills in my church bag! Well I should be off to bed! Darn knee pain!
Monday, December 1, 2008
Bigger or Better
So was sitting at home the other night waiting for a friend to call so she could come and get my stuff for Utah (as she was packing the car that night with her stuff and I wanted to make sure that she would have room for my clothes) and the front door was cracked open. We were sitting watchin TV when we heard some female giggling outside. Then the dog started barking and the doorbell rang. I got up to see what all the fun was about. There was about 6 approximate teenage girls at the door dressed in formal-wear. They had a 2001 Guinness World Records book and they said they were playing a game called "bigger or better". They said that they wanted to know if we had anything either bigger or better than the book that we were willing to trade for the book. I was kind of conufsed so they explained it again. (I wasn't that I was confused at the concept or instruction but I was kind of surprised plus there was 6 of them all giggling and kind of saying it at once) so then one of them asked if maybe we had a really really big box they could have. I was kind of asking my mom if we had anything and was thinking I would go look in the garage for something when they asked if they could have a piece of the wood from the front porch. We were like sure take one but be careful of the nails in them, (The wood was remnants from the wall that had been removed from the house but it has not been disposed of yet) so then because there was also 2 really beat up weather beaten chairs on the porch they asked if maybe they could have the chair so my mom said yes. They were all excited and then they were more excited because it had wheels on it. Then one girl said "oh I get to ride in the chair" we informed her that it may ruin her dress as well as give her splinters in un-splinter friendly areas if she chose to sit down. So she didn't and they left. So then about 5 min later we hear more giggling and went outside they were at a house kinda up the street but also across the street (we live near a T intersection of the streets so they were up the T) they no longer had the chair. So they must have gotten someone to trade for it. It was interesting. I think I have heard of similar games where you start out with something simple like a paperclip and see what you end up with. So that was my interesting event of Sat night.
Then yesterday we drove up to Utah! I love road trips! It was a lot of fun and inbetween listening to conference talks and Christmas music we were reading Harry Potter in the car. We got about half way done with the first book. Woohoo! Anyways it is getting late and we are going to the Salt Lake Temple in the morning! Catch y'all later!
Then yesterday we drove up to Utah! I love road trips! It was a lot of fun and inbetween listening to conference talks and Christmas music we were reading Harry Potter in the car. We got about half way done with the first book. Woohoo! Anyways it is getting late and we are going to the Salt Lake Temple in the morning! Catch y'all later!
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